Yes, I want another dog. No, I'm not getting one.
Just because you want it, is it the right thing to do? Things to consider before adding the second dog.
I’ve been thinking about this quite a lot recently. There are currently a few absolutely amazing litters of puppies available. And one of the breeders is someone I’ve been following for a long time. I’ve said numerous times that I’d love one of their puppies in the future. Well… That future is here. A few friends have asked me if I’m getting one. One of them skipped straight past “Are you getting one?” and went with:“Which one are you getting?” And my answer was: “I’m not getting one.” Obviously, the next question was why? And my answer was that the time isn't right. Actually, what I said was that I wouldn't be good enough for one of those puppies just now. And I don't mean that in a “Sandra is rubbish” kind of way. Quite the opposite. If I brought one of those puppies home, I would want to give it the best possible start I could. Those puppies are well bred to be active, busy, clever dogs. They are going to need plenty of appropriate outlets, training, experiences and, importantly, a lot of my individual attention if I want to help one grow into the amazing adult dog it has the potential to become. And right now, I couldn't give it that.
I already have two dogs. And they both have their own needs. Sometimes those needs are very different. Sometimes one needs individual training, while the other needs something completely different. They both need time with me individually, but they also need time doing things together. Then there's my work. I work with dogs for a living, which sounds like it should make having another dog incredibly easy. It doesn't. If anything, I probably overthink it more, because I know exactly how much work goes into helping a dog become the dog you want them to be. Adding another dog would undoubtedly bring some entertaining chaos into the house. But there would also be a lot of difficult moments. Because a puppy doesn't just slot neatly into your existing household. It changes it. The puppy needs individual time. Your existing dogs still need individual time. You need to teach the puppy the rules of the household. And the puppy doesn't know the rules yet. They don't know that that is the toy you don't touch. They don't know that the other dog doesn't appreciate having someone launching themselves at their face. They don't know when to leave another dog alone. They don't know that the cat, if you have one, isn't necessarily a wrestling partner. And they certainly don't know that just because they want something doesn't mean they're getting it. And this is where things can get tricky. Because not every older dog is endlessly tolerant and accepting of a puppy. And actually, they shouldn't have to be. I've seen quite a few people recently add a second or third dog, expecting the new dog to be similar to the dogs they already have. And sometimes all the stars align and they are.
But sometimes… The new dog can turn out to be more active. More sensitive. More demanding. More easily frustrated. More environmentally aware. More interested in other dogs. Less interested in you. More interested in EVERYTHING. And suddenly the training needs of the household are very different from what you expected. And sometimes the training you're doing isn't about creating some beautifully polished, impressive dog. It's simply the bare minimum needed to keep everyone happy and safe. Teaching dogs how to live together. Managing resources. Preventing conflict. Giving everyone enough space. Making sure one dog isn't constantly pestering another. Making sure the older dog doesn't feel like their entire life has been turned upside down. Making sure the puppy learns appropriate boundaries before those boundaries become someone else's job to enforce. Because conflict between dogs doesn't magically disappear because “they'll work it out.” Sometimes they don't. Sometimes it’s very hard or nearly impossible to fix . And when you add another dog, you don't just add another dog. You add another personality. Another set of needs. Another relationship to build. Another body that needs exercise. Another brain that needs enrichment. Another dog who may get ill. Another dog who may have behavioural difficulties. Another dog who might need you to change your routine around them. And you add another relationship between the dogs that you have to manage too. And that's a lot.
And I think sometimes we underestimate it because we see the lovely bits. The puppy photos. The cute sleeping puppy. The first walks. The training. The fun. And yes, all of that is lovely. But I don't want a puppy just because I want a puppy.
I want to get a dog when I can genuinely say: “Yes. I have the time, energy, headspace and resources to give this dog what it needs.” Not what I wish I could give it. Not what I could probably just about squeeze in. Not what I could give it if absolutely everything went according to plan. What it actually needs. And right now, that's not another dog. Which is a bit annoying, because some of these puppies are gorgeous. But sometimes loving dogs means knowing when not to get one. And maybe one day that future I kept talking about will actually be the right time. I'll just have to wait until it is. Because the right dog at the wrong time can still be the wrong decision.
Sandra @ Lothian Dog Training
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